Bob Arents: On PP&C times

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I knew Jon for only two years, but in that short amount of time I feel like I gained, and now have lost, a brother.

I had the office next door to Jon when I worked in PP&C. When I first arrived, I knew I had stumbled into a very special place. Jon, Steve St. Mary, Ed Reth, and Randy Brach were like the four musketeers, with Jon as their ringleader. They had an incredible talent for switching between humor and intense planning work, much like a normal person turns a light switch on and off. It was just amazing to me, the way they could instantaneously go from the funniest conversational jousts, like debating the literary merits of movies like “Fight Club” or discussing “belly splinters” (office injuries suffered when your bellow rubs up against a worn out desk at the OC), to intense data analysis involving complex computer systems.

As a newcomer to the group, I couldn’t speak the language of PP&C (they use numbers when they talk about different packs, like “690” means Marlboro Lights King Size Box). From day one, Jon always treated me as a friend, and had incredible patience with me as I learned to speak the language. Behind Jon’s razor sharp wit was a razor sharp intellect, and he taught me everything I needed to know (and more) about the planning part of PP&C. Jon also gave me the nickname “Stealth Bob”. At one point, Jon was not satisfied with the delays in completing needed promotions, and he and Richard Kelly sent me on a “secret mission” to go find the required machinery. It was secret, because it was another department’s area of responsibility and we were concerned about ruffling feathers. When I found some of the needed machinery, and gave the secret findings to Jon, he dubbed me Stealth Bob. That was Jon’s business side – a constant desire to do what was right for Philip Morris, backed by great intelligence, topped off with an amazing sense of humor.

But the business side was only a part of what Jon brought into work with him. Jon always had the latest update on his family readily available, and gave you that update whenever you strolled into his office (sometimes multiple times!). From the girls’ school activities, like the Oscar Meyer wiener video and community service projects, to Dane’s latest words, we always knew what the kids were up to. In fact, I think the Oscar Meyer video showed non-stop for a couple of days! Nine times out of ten, the black and white photo collage of the family was prominently displayed, either framed or on his PC monitor. He was so proud of the children, and he always beamed whenever he talked about them. Last month I saw the photo album with sound at least three or four times – every time there was an update.

Words can’t soften the blow of losing Jon so early in life. I just wanted you all to know that Jon had a tremendous impact on me, and I believe the same is true for everyone that came in contact with him. He will always be a role model for me, professionally and personally. I miss him, too.

Aunt Barbara and Uncle Aden: On memories of Jon

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When we think of Jon, we must start out by saying Jon was “one of a kind” —he was always full of life – wanting to enjoy every moment, and sharing as much as he possibly could. We are grateful to have had him in our lives, even if for far too short a time.

Jon was someone who really loved his family – would play with the girls and Dane and wanted to give them the best of everything that he possibly could. Jon was a gift to his wife, his children and each of us who knew him.

Lisa and Jon were so excited and happy when Dane arrived. That was so evident from their birth announcement! Dane should always know how very much he was welcomed.

We were able to spend a few days in Jon and Lisa’s home and experience a wonderful meal that Jon wanted to cook for us. It will always be remembered as exceptional.When we were visiting, I remember Jon wanting to go to a special tobacco shop to buy some cigars to share with Aden. How can I not smile when I think of the two of them smoking their cigars. I have a wonderful photo of Jon with Aden and Lisa’s Dad Bill smoking (outside the house) along with a bottle of Grand Marnier and Drambuie!

When Lisa’s grandmother was ill, with Jon’s support, she made the trip to see her. He also was there encouraging Lisa’s Mom, Marie to make the trip to California. His caring encouragement and assistance ensured my sister made the trip to see our Mom.

Jon loved to visit Las Vegas and Aden and I had the fun of meeting he and Lisa there on one of their trips. He really enjoyed the Las Vegas experience!

We made a trip to Orlando Florida in 2002 and shared a rental that Jon and Lisa had booked in a gorgeous executive home. It was a beautiful experience and so much fun watching Jon in the pool with the children. I have a photo of Aden and Dane taken at the Kobe Japanese Steak House where we had dinner with the beautiful Halle family.

Jon was a gentleman – a caring and loving man. God only let us have him for a short time, but that time was precious to us. We will always have our special memories.

Earl Herald: On Jon as an attractive woman

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A father’s day treat

By 2001, I had known Jon for 23 years. That was the same year Jon became my boss and most of the men in the group decided to become cross dressers (for a day). Some people were a little uncomfortable with the mere thought of a temporary gender change. But not Jon — he was completely comfortable with his manhood. And why not? It was all in good fun.

A young lady in the group (Cynthia) was a new transferee from the Philip Morris factory in Louisville, KY and was about to become a new bride. The only thing missing from the traditions of preparing for a wedding was the absence of a bachelorette party, as all her girl friends were several states away. Surely, with all the raw creative talent the group was famous for, this small obstacle could not possibly be a hindrance to fulfilling such a small feat, especially for someone so respected by her peers. So, as word spread of our surprise plan of attack, everyone began procuring the necessary armor and comparing notes on all the essentials, i.e., skirts versus slacks, hair styles, lip stick shades, heels versus flats, and the all important leather or lace. Of course, this endeavor required special coordination and leadership in order to be executed successfully. Jon was never afraid to be front and center for even the most complex challenges. He did not have to take this role on alone, but he was instrumental as usual in making sure the element of surprise and quality of execution was paramount.

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Top Row: Jimmy Moose, Jon, Vince Smith, Paul Godwin, Randy Brach, Cynthia Cunningham, Wayne Isabel, Ed Reth, Steve St. Mary, Jacqui Singleton Bottom row: Karen Crostic-Suter, Nancy Bruchbacker, Earl Herald

On the day of the event, it was arranged so that the drag queens would rendezvous at the home of a co-worker where Cynthia was scheduled to arrive for a supposed dinner out with a couple of other co-workers. Before her arrival, the scene was crazy mad with wigs, makeup, stockings — it was surely a gala event in the making. Some in the group even seemed to be a natural at the conversion, but that would be a different story. As for Jon, he had a limit on how far he would go in his gender transference. As you see in the photo, he insisted on being present as the bearded woman.

When Cynthia arrived at the house, we were all gathered in an upstairs room. The entry was a large 2 story foyer with a grand stairway leading down. As she stepped inside, music began to play which was our queue to descend in a single line very slowly so that she could soak it all in. The music was masterfully selected to capture the eloquent moment. It was Shania Twain’s popular hit at the time “I Feel Like a Woman”. Cynthia was somewhere between shocked, stunned, and hilarious with laughter.

The event will go down as one of the groups finest moments. There is a large amount of evidence that exists in the form of photographs and video tape, but most are hidden in a vault, probably Fort Knox. I was able to secretly confiscate some of the photographs, but could only share a couple of them without fearing for my life . I hope you enjoy the limited selection. As you can see, Jon was a natural. He was a lovely man in any attire, inside and out.

Sam: On Netflix

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You knetflix-movie-page-3now the expression “the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree”? Well, I guess that could be said for you, Dane.

You see, Netflix was founded in 1997 and daddy proudly wore the title of “early adopter.”

netflixdvdSoon after Netflix’s launch, he subscribed to the DVD delivery service (he didn’t skimp on the package either!) and spent hours curating his queue.  He was always so excited when a DVD arrived in the mail, and loved using his “fancy” A/V setup at home for movie nights!

I guess next time we yell at you for wanting to Netflix binge, you can blame it on genetics!

 

 

Lisa: On the old fart car

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When I first met your Dad, he had a large Buick.  It was one of those cars that you expect your grandfather to be driving. It had one large seat in the front, was blue, and I quickly made fun of it.  Who in their late 20s and early 30s drives such a beast?   Once we started dating, it was not long before he bought another car, which I think was mainly to please me.  It was a Mazda 626 which was way cooler than the Buick, but still a conservative car.  It was also blue.  He had that car until Sam was born, and we traded it in when we realized we could not travel easily in a small sedan.  The next car was a Dodge Caravan which was teal blue.  It seems your Dad really likes the color blue, right?  Yes, that was his favorite color.  Of all the cars, he really loved his VW Passat the best.  I know that is the one that all of you kids have driven, and which we still have to this day.  Interestingly, that car was bought used from Phil Dickerson, who happens to be related to Mrs. Thornhill, who was Sam’s 1st grade teacher.  Phil worked at Philip Morris, and got transferred to Switzerland, so he had to sell his 1999 Passat when it was less than a year old.  The Passat is more sporty, and had lots of power to it.

Lisa: On traveling solo with dad

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When you were born Dane, it became increasingly difficult to take trips as a family.  Having three children to take care of, as you can imagine, was not easy.  Also, you were not as easy as your sisters were at the same age, as you have heard us mention one too many times.  For example, when it came to going out to eat, it is relatively easy to get a table for four, but once you need a table for five the wait becomes longer.  Also, you were not as easygoing, quiet, and as compliant as your sisters were when you were an infant and toddler.  I remember when you were under two, you found great humor in pulling my hair, or suddenly bashing your head into my nose.  I remember one Famous Dave’s restaurant visit in which another family asked if they could place their infant child (in a car seat) toward our table instead of their table, since our table would hardly notice another chaotic baby.  Even when you were confined to an infant seat, you would take one of your toys (placed strategically to keep you occupied and quiet) and hurl it across the restaurant.  Later, when you were old enough to feed yourself, you, for no reason at all would hurl a piece of silverware much to our embarrassment.  You did not like to sit in your seat, and would crawl under a booth, or annoy someone seated near us by standing up and looking at them across a booth.  One of our favorite local restaurants was Don Jose, and the waiters and owners knew us well.  You always wanted to go the bathroom, and eventually the waiters would just take you there for us.  I am not quite sure why you behaved this way.  Perhaps it was because you were a boy, and this is what boys do.  Or, later, perhaps it was because you were frustrated in being unable to communicate your needs when your speech was slightly delayed.

So, as a backdrop to the story, please know you were somewhat of a challenge, and best watched by multiple caregivers.  But despite your spiritedness, Grandma Estelle loved to see you.  She eagerly awaited our visits, which were becoming increasingly infrequent due to us having to keep up with work and a  very busy family of five.  But your Dad wanted you to see his mother, and your grandmother.  Dad knew he was having the gastric bypass surgery the Monday prior to Thanksgiving, and had decided to not tell anyone in his family.  He did not want to worry them, and secretly wanted to surprise everyone when your cousin Jaime married David Hicks in May of 2003.  He figured they would all be greatly surprised by his weight loss, and for that reason chose not to share his pending surgery with his mother, Uncle Bob, or Uncle Stan.  In retrospect, this was not the best of plans.  But some aspect of your Dad must have been concerned, because he planned a trip to see his mother in late October/early November which was several weeks prior to his surgery.  In addition to deciding to go to see his mother, he also decided to bring you with him.

Your grandmother Estelle lived in St. Petersburg, Florida at the time.  He decided to take this trip together with you, knowing that his mother would have a large “to do” list for him, and that he also would need to keep a close eye on you, as he knew you were too much to handle for Grandma Estelle.  He arranged to have you sleep with him in the spare bedroom at Grandma’s house, rather than take a portable pack-n-play.  You departed the Richmond airport together on October 31 and returned on November 3.  It was a short trip, but the first and last vacation you had together.  Looking back now, I do not recall him doing this with either Sam or Joelle.  We always took trips together as a family.  But your sisters were in school, and did not have the time like you did to go on such a trip.  I am sure you don’t remember much of this trip, but in relaying it to you, it is my hope that somewhere in the recesses of your brain, you can pull something forward.  Perhaps a plane ride, or even one memory is still there.  You were only 2 years, and 8 months at the time, so doing that would be exceedingly difficult.  But know that you had a great time, and that your Dad was quite proud of himself for having this SOLO trip with you.

I also remember shortly after your Dad died an incident in the airport in which you were drawn to a man, and would not leave this stranger alone.  It was heartbreaking to watch, and Sam may remember it too.  You wanted to sit near him, climbed in his lap, and were so drawn to be near someone who I believe reminded you of your Dad.  It is hard to write this for you now.  You have memories that have to be relayed through others.  Your Dad loved all of us so much.  He would be proud of you, and all that you have accomplished.  As you get older, there are things that you do that remind me of your Dad.  It may be a look, a word, a glance, a laugh.  Please keep laughing.  Because of you Dane, we have the chance to see your Dad in you!

Richard Kelly: On Jon and work

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Jon was very gifted in his work. He brought great intelligence, creativity, and knowledge to his work. That’s why I wanted him to work with me and I was very fortunate that he agreed to join my team. Jon brought all of the things that I have mentioned and more to his job. Jon had the ability to take complex data and simplify it so that Executives could better understand issues and act. Countless times I would sit down with him, tell him what was needed and then leave. A few hours or days later – depending on the difficulty of the tasks – he would return with the product. Quite often, it was something much better than I had asked for. The research completed — He’d provide a graph, a chart, a presentation, a story (we all know how Jon loved stories) — he had something to make the point — the story ready to drive the business forward.

Sometimes when the work had really been impactful, I would return to him to congratulate his efforts or thank him. He quickly turned the focus to his team be it Ed, Steve, Paul, or Earl or to someone else in our department, the Plants, Purchasing or Finance, to let me know he hadn’t done it by himself and recognition needed to be shared. He understood teamwork. He cared about his colleagues. He also had very little patience for incompetent people — so he let me know if someone wasn’t pulling their fair share too. They “dropped us in a bucket” was one of his favorite sayings. Jon believed in sharing information and keeping a strong network around our Company. He had friends and contacts in New York, Japan, Asia, Australia, Europe, Charlotte, Louisville and in about every plant and department in Richmond. He was on a first name basis with Machine Operations, Senior Executives, and even the President of our Company.

You could count on Jon for some humor every day. Whether it was his spontaneous wit, a prepared joke, or a Dilbert comic that he delivered to you — he knew to enjoy life every day — and I believe he did. He could laugh at himself and he could laugh at you. However, he was very serious about doing a good job and wanted to always be adding value. He just enjoyed the present and kept everything in perspective (family, work, having some fun).